Picoreview: Die Hard 5: ugh.
I mean, on one hand, yes, it was a Die Hard movie, what do you expect. But on the other hand, mild spoilers behind the cut.
I understand that they felt they needed to start out high-octane and then crank it up. I get that. I do. Unfortunately, I thought they started out too high octane, giving themselves nothing to build up to, and ended with a big fat “So what?” at the end.
But even that wasn’t my real problem with it. My real problem was that John McClane is a cop, someone who cares about the people around him, and five minutes after he arrives in Russia, he’s running tank-sized vehicles over ordinary citizens’ cars. He’s sacrificing other people for the percieved welfare of his son, and I just flat out didn’t buy it. So they completely blew my suspension of disbelief ten minutes into the movie, and it never recovered. This from somebody who hooted gleefully when he shot a helicopter with a motorcycle in the last film.
Also, his kid is a goddamned moron. When McClane shows up and blows his cover, the answer is obviously not “run away from the American making a fuss in the middle of Moscow,” but contain the American making a fuss in the middle of Moscow. He should’ve pulled him into the frigging vehicle and explained himself while they were getting away. Moron.
Anyway, I saw this weeks ago and was still so irritated that I actually bothered to picoreview it, so pbhbhlt. There.