Me: Can I beguile you with some cake?
Visiting friend: Oh, no thank you, I’m more a brownies kind of pers–is that German chocolate cake? LET ME RECONSIDER MY HASTY DECISION
Friend, later: As is always the case with everything that Catie bakes, IT WAS THE BEST GERMAN CHOCOLATE CAKE I HAVE EVER HAD.
Me: I’d say you flatter me, but it’s probably also true. :)
***
Delivery fella just dropped off a big box of stuff. “Big boxes are usually for men,” he said, “plastic bags with dresses, things like that, are usually for women.”
I said I usually got big boxes of stuff, but I didn’t think to quip, “The dresses, those would be my husband’s,” until 2 minutes too late. #damn
***
The other night Young Indiana ran all the way up the stairs to his bedroom without giving Ted a kiss first. I said, “Indy, come back down and give Daddy his kiss.”
“But how did you KNOW I didn’t?” he demanded.
“Because I’m a supergenius,” I replied. “My IQ is over 130. I’m very clever. Now come down here, poor Daddy is all sad and has nothing to hug except this,” and my brain failed me for the word ‘banister’ and I concluded, somewhat less than brilliantly, with, “stump.”
Ted and I spent the next five minutes giggling helplessly while Indy said, “What’s funny? What’s so funny? Did I do something funny?!”
Ever so slightly in my defense, I’d thought of and rejected the word ‘banister’ because it was actually the newel post, the correct name of which I could not recall, that I was referring to. But that didn’t make it any less funny. “SUUUUUUUUUUUPERGENIUS,” said Ted, as we giggled.
***
Couple days ago a cabbie said “Typical woman driver!” of a woman who was making a bad driving decision. I said “What an incredibly sexist thing to say. How about you never say anything like that in front of a child again.”
He said “But did you see what she was doing!”
I said, “Bad driving is not gender related and it’s sexist and arrogant to say so.” #seethes
***
I tell you what, I’m gonna have a Methos Manor House Weekend at some point. I have not yet decided if I’m going to make attendees wear period costumes or just pyjamas. (The general response: period pyjamas! alternating with “dress up as different Peter Wingfield characters.” :))