Oh, for…

April 24, 2006

This is a locked-to-the-flist post because while I’m exasperated, the person I’m exasperated with will fling herself on my mercy and swear she didn’t mean it that way if this is public, and I’ve finally had it up to Here with that, so.

emailed me earlier wondering if I was still going to ButcherCon, since the venue had changed (again) and she saw I was no longer listed on the guest list. I said, “Huh,” because I think I was the second person invited to be a guest at ButcherCon (after, you know, JIM) and emailed to say, “I see I’m no longer listed on the guest list. What does that mean?”

This is what I got back:

What it means is we are now a non-profit and since we didn’t see it listed on your website, we assumed you weren’t coming. At this point, we don’t have it in our budget to fly you out and pay your hotel. If you are planning to register for the event, we can put you on the speaker list, but we really prefer to have speakers who are willing to cross-promote, by linking to our website, telling people about their appearances at our events, etc. The cost of us payiing a web designer, maintenance and ads for the event has eaten up a lot of the budget we would have used for airfares….

Yes, well, it’s true, I didn’t have it listed on cemurphy.net. In fact, checking the appearances page, it proves I haven’t actually updated that this year at all. Which is probably bad, but isn’t the point. The point is, nobody *asked* me to crosslink, or in any way communicated this. I am reminded of the manner in which the Writer’s Weekend website was taken away from me, and how that was done accidentally. *snort* *laugh* I’m sorry, I still think that’s funny.

Anyway. The point being, I will not be attending ButcherCon, or any other Junker enterprise in the foreseeable future. Karen puts on a fun-to-be-there con, but this is just not worth it.

25 thoughts on “Oh, for…”

  1. Right. I think the majority of what I have to say about that is “Heh.”

  2. ….. well, that’s distressing. I’m sorry this has happened, hon. :(

  4. Gah?! What a crock – they can’t expect you to do something if You Don’t Know you have to. And to not TELL you that you’ve been dropped… that’s even worse. I repeat, what a crock.

  5. I considered ending that post by saying, “Sarah, this is where you get to say I Told You So as many times as you like.” :)

  6. I’m just exasperated, not even distressed. This is the hands-thrown-up, I-give-up stage.

  7. I, for one, am selfishly glad that it means you’ll be making it to WFC. I think that will be a more fun and more productive con for you anyway.

  9. Quick, link to their website so the con makes a profit and you can fly there! *heeheehee*

  10. I don’t really want to say I told you so. Okay, well, maybe just once. :)

    I’ve been watching her fall into this pattern again this year (I was going to go, because she “owed me” for not going last year. But she’s done an awful lot of backing out and reneging(sp) *again*.

    So I think I’ll stay away.

  11. Yeah. The real reason to go to ButcherCon for me was social, and, er. I can socialize somewhere else. Sheesh. :)

  12. Wow.

    There’s a percentage of fandom that just has no _sense_, no idea how functional adults do things. And they often are proud of this, smugly ‘different’ than normal. But these elements – courtesy, communication, professionalism – aren’t the things to choose deviance in.

    This is why I rarely interact with the larger geek subculture. Way too many of these people, and they drive off people like me until they’re the last ones standing.

  13. Well, that’s absolutely ludicrous.

    But I am likely going anyway. You know how it is. It’s only 5 hours drive for me, and you know how long I’ve known Jim, and blah blah blah.

    -R

  15. The point is, nobody *asked* me to crosslink, or in any way communicated this.

    See, that sounds like a couple of the womenfolk I’ve dated over the years. Even the current expects me to know something she’s never communicated in any fashion. :P

  16. Making a completely random observation…there are reasons why people appear to “drop out” of things. :)

    Will I see you at Nationals in Atlanta, Sarah?

    I miss both of you.

  17. I will see you at WFC.

    I’m feeling a bit taken advantage of regarding some things about writer’s weekend currently, but well see how it goes.

    It’s only five days of my life. :-P

  19. I would go, too, if it were only a 5 hour drive, just for the social aspect. I didn’t know you were *planning* on going, and now I have an *extra* reason to beat my head against the wall. Wah.

  20. After some more thought I’m not so sure I’m planning on going. Honestly, I don’t want to go to a convention or a writer workshop or whatever. I’d like to see yon Butchers, but they always live there, so. You’re not going to be there. Dunno if is going; if so, it’d be a shame to miss him, but it wouldn’t be the first time I did.

    So, eh.

  21. Oops, just saw this. Well I totally understand why you’re not going now. Ick. Ditto on the it’s only a 5-hour drive away (well, 4 for me actually), which is the main reason I’m going. That and it’s my birthday weekend so makes a nice present. Of course, I was planning to take my husband, too (he’s a non-writer), but the email we just got about all the changes, etc. has confused us so now we’re not exactly sure what the heck’s going on…Sounds like this is nothing unusual. Heh.

  22. I am, indeed, going, and Kit not showing up will certainly lessen the experience for me. Ah, well. :)

  23. I’ll add that anything involving gaming happening there is gonna happen on the sly and off the clock, if at all. The transformation into a non-profit thang led to the gaming stuff getting the boot — I don’t really have a problem with this, of course; I wasn’t sure that merging an authorship-focused con with a gaming con was a good move to begin with. Plus, Karen actually told me that it was the case, instead of letting me discover it.

    I’m vexed by her behavior with you, but it honestly *could* have been an oversight, rather than intentional spite or anything. I’m at least doing my best these days not to read the worst motives into things. Haven’t been so good at that in the past. ;)

    Still, bah. Wanted to see you in person again. That’s gotten kicked in the nads.

    Poop.

  24. I am totally on the fence at this point. This fence is very uncomfortable!

  25. It’s not intentional spite. It’s Karen’s typical passive-aggressive behavior. I mean, I’m exasperated, but I’m genuinely not upset about it, because I’m so not-surprised. If it were not for the fact that it is an international flight and that I would very much like to go to WFC 2 weeks later, I would probably go anyway, but I can’t afford to do both on my own dime.

    I’m obviously going to have to come visit DC.

    *pause*

    I’m obviously going to have to make enough money that Ted doesn’t have to work, so we can fly off to places like DC when we want to. :)

Comments are closed.